okay…keep saying that i”m going to post something about the profound ”experiences” i had more then a week back. gonna try. very rough notes. mostly in the forum of sketches, but hopefully it will jog the mindset of the moment. what i thought about it all. my conclusions anyway.\r\n\r\nthen i”ll post it in the forum. for comments/discussion.\r\n\r\n——————————————————–\r\n\r\nIf life is like a box of chocolates, and consciousness is like the Internet, then I”m a chocolate Virgin Mary melting on the dashboard of some cosmic car.\r\n\r\nAt first, I found myself in a massive desert. As far as I could see before me, and behind was just one, long, winding trail of people in exodus. I was riding in a box carriage type deal that was strapped to the back of an elephant, save (easily) three times the size of a regular elephant…so I had a good vantage point. Many people were on foot, some on donkeys, and occasionally I”d pass a small camp of people off to either side that were resting/regrouping. The entire scene was perplexing. The others that were sharing the carriage with me, paid me no attention…save for the old, weathered, ”wise” man across from me that stared at me the whole time, but without emotion of any sort.\r\n\r\nI was trying to grasp some sort of meaning from it all, when I felt that familiar slithering inside me. My attention was redirected (per usual) to getting the thing(s) out of me. The useless pulling & tug-of-war; each handful, a painful jolt of high-intensity electricity. I”ve always sensed two basic varieties inside me…one that hurts when I attempt to latch onto it, and another variety that feels dirty, coated with that thick, brown-gray sludge, moves slower, and responds less (almost lethargic in nature). Anyway…I finally managed to get a hold of large squidy attachment, and gained the upper hand as I working on destroying him through a hands-on method of frying light…when he began to plead with me to let him loose.\r\n\r\nSomething I”ve never done before is ”negotiate”. I told him I”d let him go if he told me the secret to ridding myself of all attachment (all at once). He resisted, and I worked him over a little more, and asked again. Finally, he whispered that I had to command him to ”clean” me entirely. That I couldn”t do it myself, and that he couldn”t do it unless I “cast” him to do it (like putting him under a direct spell). So, I was halfway through commanding him, when I looked across the carriage into the eyes of the wise-man…and suddenly I halted…panicked, and quickly asked the squidy, “Wait! What happens when I”m completely clean of all my attachments???” He paused, and extended himself close to my ear…and whispered, “You die”.\r\n\r\nWell, I thought about that for a moment…and then I let him go. His words, his energy was so sincere, so matter of fact that I didn”t question it in the least. For some reason it made complete sense to me. The squidy slowly wrapped himself back around me, and moved into me again through the small of my back. I looked back at the wise-man and he smiled.\r\n\r\nThen all at once I was tripping the light-fantastic; whisked away again through the stellar, neuro-circuitry of infinite space to the Peaceful Place, where the happy things grow, and shown lots of great advancements; how life could be here, or what we all have to look forward to in ”the end”.\r\n\r\nLots of the same consistent themes…A male and female representative (in-training), but consciously far advanced. Lots of training going on in fact; possibly just the area I happened to be visiting…and a quick history/tour of the place. In all directions the terrain was similar to Earth, but condensed, or somehow optimized. Every time I shifted my gaze it fell on a different environment…mountains, desert, jungle, woods, grasslands, etc. with lots of water sources throughout…but no cities to be seen. Just, pristine natural environments. It wasn”t until my eyes began to settle on one spot, then another, that I realized that it all was city. Every cliff was dotted with windows and balconies, every rolling hill was the same, every massive tree that towered hundreds of feet in the air, even underwater…was ”home” to these people. All habitat was organically interwoven with the natural environment, so it wasn”t immediately seen.\r\n\r\nTransportation was by a sort of mono-rail system, either mass carrying, or by individual shuttle, and the main interest all around (as far as days were spent) was in self-education. Not a lot of this occupation was shown to me that I understood. Basically, it felt very holistic without exterior agenda…where people were free to learn about whatever interested them in the moment, and from that there were ”interest groups” who worked together in experimental environments manifesting this and that. There was no sense of time. No rush to anything.\r\n\r\nI asked if it was “real”…what I was seeing, the environments, etc. At the time I was pointing at one of the cliffs/apartments in awe…asking if it was real rock; wondering how they”d hollow out something of that size. The boy assigned to me (looking to be about 18, but feeling much older) smiled, and said, “of course it’’s real”. He went on a bit about an individual who had developed the ability for manifestation, saying something about “K-11″ being the first experimental planet that had changed their destiny. There was a mix of feelings…that it was someplace ancient and yet on-going. Hard to describe, except to say like a library maybe…or the place that held the basic incorruptible program, and that “from that” many other worlds had developed on their own accord, as if by some form of ”open-source” collaboration, built upon the original system. Briefly, there were glimpses of all the places I”ve ever journeyed to, and from a very simple perspective they all suddenly made sense.\r\n\r\nAfter the tour, we returned again to the main complex that I had arrived at, and some time was taken to explain the basic process of consciousness, or ”our” role in their development, which might not appear that fascinating at first, but as I”ve continued to roll it over in my mind, and apply it to whatever comes up…it seems to hold a good amount of “truth”, in that…I haven”t yet figured out a situation where it doesn”t make sense on a very basic level.\r\n\r\nThe couple (boy & girl) who were speaking in telepathic union, started by explaining to me one very-very simple concept. It was that infinite sea (infancy?!?), that space of kaleidoscopic light in by-ways, highways, pathways, and threads…undulating and alive. Infinite. And, it isn”t that the actual structure itself is lit, but that it’’s made of infinitesimal points of light, like living cells, but more then that; all in some flow, and flux around us…through us. Everywhere. They pointed out (as best they could) that there was an action (by humans) of reaching out into this sea and touching on a single point. There was a glimpse of that ‘’silver filament” (cord of connection) whipping around from each person, in an unconscious pattern like the tail of a cat. Each time it hits on a point of light “It’’s a THOUGHT”. (It’’s a thought! A thought. That action just kept rolling over and over through my mind the entire time). The couple paused as if to give me space to process. It was immediate, and at the same time on-going. It was almost too simple.\r\n\r\nThe basic understanding is that we are all conceived “clean”. Then between that point and birth we develop the ability to “tap in”. Until that point it’’s all random information, and this ability isn”t fully developed till around the age of three. At that point we begin “collecting” thoughts. (aka developing “identity”) It’’s in keeping with our current understanding of neural-pathways that can be severed, and reconnected through repetition of assosciations. And this is where I”m going to start applying my own understanding to all of it, bcuz what I was receiving from the couple was too simple to put into words…\r\n\r\nWith each connection we make to a squidy (aka information package/cluster/light source) there are cookies exchanged, just like computers…some sort of signature that keeps that info-pkg in some kind of close proximity (although time & space are not relative if thought of in terms of the Internet). Once a connection is established, we continue to draw on the same packages again and again, but always capable of adding, or building upon that information. Not so easy to “deprogram” as is discussed. But, the basic idea is that none of this information is our own. Our identity is established from the connections we make. As we collect……we become who we believe we are, how we believe it is, etc. And all this information is stored in a ”collective” database, but in total as “individual” information packages, connected to other ”relevant” packages that share similar energy/weight ?!? I have no idea, since general computer programming is something beyond me. But, still thinking “open-source” here.\r\n\r\nAt this point everything is looking like a highly developed Internet system. So, I start thinking where does the whole idea of “negs” come into play? And loud and clear the idea of Hackers come to mind. It’’s clear at this point that there are both negative and positive attachments (for lack of better terms)…and that underlying all the images they all appear individually as highly-evolved tentacled entities, and now thinking little wi-fi type electrical-bodies of code. And, without losing myself in description…if the original source…this Internet, these “packages” were developed for a specific goal, doesn”t mean that it can”t be taken advantage of by others. The same way that our Internet is utilized by Hackers. There is a definite feeling with this idea of Hacked-Negs traveling the *same* pathways, performing in basically the exact same manner as the ”ligitimate” packages, and building similar rapport with either or. That it’’s an element that has to be accounted for, bcuz it can”t be controlled. In a sense it could be viewed as completely natural to the system in place, yet foreign.\r\n\r\nAnyway, some basic thoughts…\r\n- The whole idea of identity is more an act of phising, and the idea that none of our thoughts are our own, but ”pinged” from these ”clusters”, gives a whole new meaning to the idea of “profiling”.\r\n\r\n- The info-clusters/pkgs that appear squid or insect like in nature, are some kind of highly-evolved, organic, high-tech, zip-drives, and it’’s not that any of them can be categorized as good & bad (for they”re merely carrying devices, although conscious and intelligent in their own right bcuz they are alive)(but driven/directed by a ‘’source” that may have ulterior or conflicting agendas). Something that’’s simply seen in the goings on of our very own cells…conscious intelligence of their own, as a group, and in reference to our individual operation & function. Integral, yet separate.\r\n\r\n- Since I have no idea of the true intent behind any of this information I gleaned, it’’s hard to say one way or the other…what’’s at work. If I take the information that I”m getting ”here & now” from what’’s currently in place technologically speaking, and what’’s in the works…and hurl all that into hyperspace; it’’s very easy for me to see it come back round full circle and have “us” be the focus of study for some far advanced civilization that is in all practical purposes our future generation (yet to exist). That makes little sense. If…a dozen generations from now the technology exists to turn our everyday internet into a full blown matrix/collective universe of existence unto itself…where it’’s capable of uploading individual experiences collectively into it. Possibly even go as far as to consider that time travel becomes commonplace, and that much of the situations involving ”watchers” and abductions could be the future coming back to hook us into the ever-growing workings/database of ”their” existence. (The past is happening now type thing).\r\n\r\n- Then the whole idea of ”the matrix” itself, where what we believe we”re experiencing is truly all virtual reality; that the world doesn”t exist as we know it, and that we”re all just information-clusters zipping and pinging around in this sea of consciousness. Some futuristic Second-Life experiment.\r\nInternet XII or something.\r\n\r\n- And…who owns The Net? Who implemented it? Who is it “run” by?\r\n- What does it run on?\r\n\r\n- Thinking of this place I visited…easily fits into the stereotypical ideas of “heaven”; a world where ALL exists. And what the inhabitants of such a place…(where there’’s no death, no sickness, no hunger…no needs or wants for anything), what would those people SEEK? what would amuse them? what would they desire? What would fill their experience…except “experience”!?! ”Random experience” that they could use to refine their world of ultimate being?!?\r\n\r\n- Looking at the basis for the Internet now, how we all utilize it, what we draw from it, what we contribute uniquely…into the collective. How we “build” upon it. And…\r\nwhat it might look like a hundred years from now.\r\n\r\n- Ideas about the ”cookie” thing. Drawing on the same packages of information again and again, eventually developing this ”identity of self”, these beliefs. How difficult it is to wipe the cookies clean, and draw on entirely new information, and yet how simple it could also be once we recognize what it is, how it works. There were also ideas passed along about ”family”, with the idea of ”networks”. That people close to one another, or off-spring from…will pull from many of the same clusters. And/or that people who aren”t relate, but share the same clusters will gather amoungst themselves, group, herd, etc. And some thoughts about how animals are being integrated (slowly), currently domesticated ”pets” are being hooked in, where simpler forms of clusters are working to share their experiences as well, but somehow working closely through the person or family they”re attached to (as another family member). How we interpret it all as social & cultural conditioning, that there could easily be another level to it all; one that’’s much more binary.\r\n\r\nAnyway. The most profound thing that surfaced in it all, was the idea that we aren”t what we think we are…although, “I think therefore I am”…is very exact!!! That we are merely a collection of downloads, cross-loads, and code. And, that getting to a state of complete cleansing…in essence…a “wiping” of hard-drives, ceases to make us of service. Nothing existing that doesn”t serve a purpose. And that the whole idea of shedding exterior influence, or peeling off layers of identity, ego, self, etc. to reach this completely pure state of being…might not in fact be necessary.\r\n\r\nOn the other-hand, what is that innate urge to do so? If these ideas (no matter how benign they appear), are in fact some advanced Internet workings beyond us. And, if those working have a ”driver”, an agenda all it’’s own…then possibly our need to seek liberation from that is “KEY”. Maybe ALL of this is not any true aspect of us at all?!? All “slave-drives” to the SOURCE…………..and a constant calling to this strange thing considered “FREEDOM” is just waking up to the goings on, and seeing exits.\r\n\r\nBut, then again……………really, truly…how does on escape such a thing?!? Everyone currently talking about what great advances are just ahead. Integrating fully with the Internet, living virtual realities, unlimited identities/avatars, a NEW collective consciousness of telepathic cross-loading, data-mining, and unlimited storage of knowledge…where we as human beings replace the cell phones, computers, and PDAs. The bio-circuitry. Which, all just goes back round again to my original ideas about what everyone calls “negs” really being nothing more then ourselves in the future…coming back to haunt us……………warn us………..keep us disturbed enough to keep seeking solution.\r\n\r\nArg. Too much thinking for one day!\r\n;)